Never The Same

I was recently inspired to start writing again. Not sure if it's the onset of winter and not wanting to go outside (seriously... it was -18F/-27C last week), hitting the "slow" season at work or the recent inspiration of a few other blogs I've read. So here I am, attempting to share a little of me again.
A lot has happened over the last year. A lot of change in the last few months especially. Labour Day weekend Brian proposed... I said yes:) And we were married in Montana 1 month ago today. Our wedding was small and intimate. We piled about 30 people in a cabin in the mountains and gave our lives to each other before God and witness. There was so much love and blessing in that place; it was a humbling moment.
The journey to our wedding and after has been filled with memories. A few unexpected road bumps, but overall, things we can look back on and laugh as we remember. Everything from forgotten birth certificates, to being snowed out of our honeymoon destination and making emergency room runs. In all honestly, despite the craziness of it all, our lives have been an adventure so far and I hope it never stops. Taking the time to reflect we've seen God's hand on all of it.
A question that came up while Brian and I were doing devotions the other morning was: What is the most spiritually significant moment of your life? The older I've become the more important reflection has become. I don't want to "stay reliving" the past--rather I want to see where I've come, were I am today and believe even greater thing for the future because of what I see. As both of us pondered the above question I came up with 2 answers.
The first being my baptism. Easter Sunday 2008. I remember it so well...it is a day I hold close to my heart. The peace and joy that flowed over me was amazing. I know the gates of heaven opened that day and poured out the Holy Spirit over my life in a new way. My life hasn't been the same since. The second moment would be standing at the alter with my beloved husband. God was whispering to me that I didn't have to fight alone any more. Brian and I clasped hands, raised our arms and let God's Spirit pour over us as we worshiped. A little bit of heaven came down and met us that day. Again, my life hasn't been the same since. Marriage is truly a gift from above.

Tears of Joy

Summer has been a whirlwind to say the least!!! This has been my second go-round of events with the Synod of the Heartland. Last weekend we finished out Power Connection--our last major event of 2010--with a bang:) When I see people stand up saying they want Jesus to be apart of their life, I know every extra hour, late night (or sleepless night for that matter) was worth it. I spent a precious moment with a fellow team member (also a dear friend) rejoicing with the angels in heaven. We cried tears of joy for the lives that were touched and prayed for the floodgates of heaven to pour down over their open hearts. Jesus knocked and they said YES!!!!!!!!!
I continually thank God for the opportunity he has given me. After I graduated from university, I really didn't have a clue what I would end up doing. The road hasn't always been easy but the journey leading me up to this point has made me who I am. I have finally found a job that "fits". My gifts and passions are being used and developed. I waited on the Lord and he answered me! My life is FULL.

Colorado

I was in Estes Park, CO this past week for Rocky Mountain High Organizing Team meetings. In just over a year we will have between 2000-3000 youth up there for an event!!! All the stuff I have to learn to help make this happen was a little overwhelming but it was exciting at the same time! It is a beautiful location and at one of the largest YMCA camps in the country. You can't see it in this picture... but we are smack dab in the middle of the mountains. It is a gorgeous sight. I always feel so small when I'm in the mountains. It always reminds me how big God really is. The night before we left it started snowing. When we woke up there was a foot of snow on the ground!!!! It reminded me a lot of home (Smithers that is).

May I Have This Dance?

I just finished reading (well technically re-reading) a book that has challenged me in many ways. I love the closing scene the author chooses. It's a description of a couple at an eloquent ball. The host chooses an unexpected woman to be his partner for the opening dance. He makes eye contact and holds it with her the whole way out to the dance floor. Just as the music is about to start the woman hesitates. He senses her hesitation and overrides her fear with confidence by taking her hand and telling her to follow him--he will lead. All she has to do is gather up the courage to trust his lead.

It can be a scary move sometimes. I know I fight the battle of wanting to lead but when I let go and follow things flow like they're supposed too. How often do I try to take the lead from Jesus... or for that matter can't work up the courage to even begin dancing. I let fear, inadequacy or the thought of being a disappointment take over. This paragraph hit home when I read it:

"Jesus is extending His hand to you. He is inviting you to dance with Him. He asks, 'May I have the dance... everyday of your life?' His gaze is fixed on you. He is captivated by your beauty. He is smiling. He cares nothing of the opinion of others. He is standing. He will Lead. He waits for your response." --Eldredge

May you always feel His gaze, soak it in and dance like He's the only one watching!

One Year In Iowa

One year ago today I started my first day of work here in Orange City, IA! This past year has held a lot of memories... some make me laugh... others make me want to cry. In many aspects, this has been a hard year but a good year. I still feel as thought I am in transition--a part of me wonders if that feeling will ever go away out here. Here is a small recap of the GOOD year I have had:)

Hannah and I playing with the bears in South Dakota on our road trip

Girls weekend in Vancouver... my first encounter with the ocean after the big move!

April and I spending some quality time together in Winnipeg

Halloween... we know how to dress in STYLE

The onething conference in Kansas City (once again... chipotle was STILL worth the wait)

Bob and I making snow angels... another regular day at work!!!

Thanks for enjoying this little walk down memory lane with me!!! Time sure does fly when you're having fun:)

2nd Moon Coffee Cafe

I’m sitting in downtown Minneapolis at the coolest little coffee shop. There’s funky art on the walls, old overused couches in the corner and a random string of over-sized Christmas lights strung from one end of the shop to the other. It’s a breath of fresh air from the fast paced, overly stereotypical Starbucks I have become accustom too. This is personally… and I LOVE IT!

Today has been a day of RECALL (believe it or not I’m “working” right now). I am soaking in every bit of today. I got told to leave my schedule at home and go rediscover me. What is my heart saying? What are those voices that need to be drowned out? What is God trying to say to me that I’ve been too busy to listen too?

I’ve been wanting to hide recently. I’ve been wanting to disappear and make all the things I can’t control go away. If only I could vanish into thin air and come back another day…maybe. I’ve been trying so hard to control certain areas of my life and quite frankly, it’s tiring me out. A few days ago one of my friends called and told me I need to stop telling God what to do. Easier said than done. I’m slowly peeling back my fingers from the death-grip I’ve managed to wrap around my life. I know it’s going to hurt when I finally let go and I’m not sure if I’m ready to face that hurt yet. Finger by finger I will let go. I am letting go. All in all , I know I have desires in my heart this world cannot satisfy. I can’t run away. I can’t disappear. But I can continue to put my trust in one who is GREATER than the emotional roller coaster I put myself on. If I continue to look UP my vision will come into focus and my death grip will be loosed. I will raise my hands and surrender to King of Kings.

Reminiscing

The last couples weeks I've been going through an assortment of picutres I"ve taken over the years. I busted out some photos from Alaska, New Zealand, the road trip out to Iowa. Its been fun recalling all the stories that come with these small snapshots in my life:) It has made me hungry for another good adventure. I feel like I'm on the brink of going crazy if a good adventures doesn't come out the wood work sometime soon! I've found myself pulling... maybe yanking would be a better word... on the reigns these last couple weeks from throwing all responsibility and (little) finances aside to appease my restless moments of desperation for ADVENTURE.
Maybe the restlessness has something to do with my one year anniversary of being in Iowa coming up... strange to think I it's almost a year. I don't feel like it's been that long. I still feel like a newbie--maybe part of that has to do with my inability to sense direction out here. It was bad to start with but I feel like it's slightly worse not having reference points like mountains, hills, and mass bodies of water to guide me. I have the exciting experiences of getting lost in cornfields and wondering how long its going to take before some fed-up farmer comes out of his house with a shotgun locked and loaded ready to chase me off his property!
In the meantime, I will continue to be the responsible one. I will pour everything I have into what I have around me and not miss the moments I am in. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence right? I going to choose to look at my own green grass and stop to smell the flowers along the way!